Dealing with Anger?

Until now, most of the time this blog has been used for general musings, pictures of the kids, and of course recipes.  But today I've decided to talk about a subject a little close to home and personal for me..... anger.  Writing a blog post about it forces me to dig deep into scripture to uncover what God has to say about the subject.  And I get to share what I find with anyone out there interested in reading it.

I will be the first to admit that I struggle with anger on almost a daily basis.  Then I struggle with guilt over being angry.  I mean.... the Bible says that anger is wrong, right?

Well, yes and no.

Psalm 37:8 says "Cease from anger and foresake wrath; Do not fret, it leads only to evildoing. For evildoers will be cut off, But those who wait for the LORD, they will inherit the land."

Anger can lead us to do evil.  Anger, the emotion is not evil but it can give the devil wiggle room in our minds and our hearts.  If unchecked it can lead to wrath and fury, causing us to sin.

In Ephesians Paul gives Christians a set of standards to live by.  Among them are refences to anger.

"Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body. In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold."  - Eph 4:25-27

Also, verses 31 and 32 - "Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you."

Anger is a naturally occuring emotion.  What we do with our anger is our choice.  God tells us not to STAY angry, not to let our anger evolve to WRATH and cause us to sin.

"A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control" - Proverbs 29:11

"How much more grevious are the consequences of anger than the causes of it." - Marcus Aurelius

Anger itself is not a sin.  The Bible contains accounts of times when Jesus became angry.  (Matthew 21:12-13, Mark 3:5)  Jesus was without sin!  Therefore, anger is not a sin, it is neither wrong nor right (or for a more grown up word we can say it is amoral).  The anger displayed by Jesus is true righteous anger.  Jesus was angered not at a personal attack on him.  And He handled His anger in a appropriate way.  To learn how to deal with our own anger we can look at how Jesus dealt with His.

Got Questions Ministries lists the following six traits of Jesus' anger.

1) His anger had the proper motivation. In other words, He was angry for the right reasons. Jesus’ anger did not arise from petty arguments or personal slights against Him. There was no selfishness involved.

2) His anger had the proper focus. He was not angry at God or at the “weaknesses” of others. His anger targeted sinful behavior and true injustice.

3) His anger had the proper supplement. Mark 3:5 says that His anger was attended by grief over the Pharisees’ lack of faith. Jesus’ anger stemmed from love for the Pharisees and concern for their spiritual condition. It had nothing to do with hatred or ill will.

4) His anger had the proper control. Jesus was never out of control, even in His wrath. The temple leaders did not like His cleansing of the temple (Luke 19:47), but He had done nothing sinful. He controlled His emotions; His emotions did not control Him.

5) His anger had the proper duration. He did not allow His anger to turn into bitterness; He did not hold grudges. He dealt with each situation properly, and He handled anger in good time.

6) His anger had the proper result. Jesus’ anger had the inevitable consequence of godly action. Jesus’ anger, as with all His emotions, was held in check by the Word of God; thus, Jesus’ response was always to accomplish God’s will.


If we keep these in mind we can deal with our own anger in a way that is pleasing to God instead of letting it become a destructive force. 

My prayer for today is that I have the strength to let go of my anger and the selfishness that I use to justify it, to replace it with the love and forgiveness that God has shown to me.

Have a blessed Friday everyone!  Stay warm!

A Message from God.... through Dora the Explorer???

I have always believed that God speaks to us in a way that we will best understand and accept.  I think few people would be able to grasp the magnificence and meaning of a spoken word from God Himself.  Instead messages come through sermons, scripture, songs, friends.... and Dora the Explorer??  Maybe I've been a little stubborn lately, a little resistant to what He's been trying to tell me.  Maybe He finally decided to get down on my level.... and that seems to be a cartoon meant for a preschool audience.

It could be stress, it could be exhaustion, it could just be that I'm a little strange, but the episode of Dora that Tori was watching in my room this morning while I got ready for work really spoke to me.  We've watched it a hundred times on dvd, but it happened to be airing on tv this morning as well.

In this episode Dora is faced with a problem, a crisis even.  To resolve the crisis she has to overcome three obstacles and reach a goal.  How many times have we been in a similar situation.  How often does the solution to a crisis contain more than one obstacle or hurdle?  It makes it look like such a daunting and impossible mission.  Not to mention the evil one (in Dora's case, the witch) making the journey harder all along the way and just waiting for you to give up and give in.

As Dora overcomes each obstacle and completes each task she is given a magical tool that can be used at the next stop.  This is where the wheels in my head really started turning.  I was bothered that Dora was teaching children that there are magical tools that will just be handed to you.  Really, when was the last time someone handed you a bag of sunshine or a magical hair brush that would make your life easier?

Then it hit me.  I do have tools to conquer any crisis.  They don't necessarily come from friends and acquaintances, they come straight from God.  He has given us His Word to guide us, to use as a map.  The tool of prayer is a mighty one, a lifeline straight to God Himself.  His love, mercy, and grace can carry us through any obstacle.  Not over or around them, we will still have to endure them and overcome them.  But we never have to do it alone.

Dora's tools can only be used once.  She has to carefully choose when that time is.  Unlike Dora, the tools we are freely given never run out, their energy can never be exhausted.  No matter how many times we need it, God's grace can never be used up.  We are not given a set number of times we can call on God through prayer.  Everything He offers us is unending.

Have a blessed and wonderful day!

A Time for Thanks Giving - The Finale

This is the final entry in my four week series of things that I am thankful for.  I saved the best for last, of course.

Absolutely, beyond a shadow of a doubt, the thing that I am most grateful for in my life is a loving, saving, grace-giving God.

God loves me and you with such passion and protectiveness.  You can even go so far as to say that God is jealous for us, for our affections and our allegiance.  He desires an intimate, personal relationship with each and every one of us.

For me, this means that I can put aside trying to be perfect, trying to do enough, be enough and accomplish enough.  He loves me AS I AM... sometimes weak, sometimes needy, and always imperfect.  I am made perfect through Him, through the sacrifice of His Son.  How many people are you willing to sacrifice your own child for.  I'm going to say no one.  I couldn't even bear the thought of it.  But God did.... He sent His only Son to atone for the sins of a lost world, for everyone who was, is, or ever will inhabit this earth.

Deep stuff, huh?  I understand love.... I love my husband, my children, my friends and family.  But take that love (and it's a whole lot of love) and multiply it by a million and still, you're not even close to the love that God feels for all of us.  How can I ever express how thankful I am for that?

When we receive God's love we are expected to show that love to others around us.  There are endless possibile opportunites to serve others and spread a little love.  Ask around.... at your church, your job, on the internet.  All For Good lets you search for volunteer opportunities by location.  Take your kids!  What better way to teach them to show God's love than by teaching them to serve.

I hope that each of you has a wonderfully blessed Thanksgiving!

A Time for Thanks Giving - Part Three

The Thanksgiving holiday is fast approaching.  My first Thanksgiving celebration is actually a potluck lunch tomorrow.  How crazy that we're starting the Thank-feasting a full week before the actual holiday arrives!  That just goes to show that it's never too early to give thanks.  In fact, giving thanks shouldn't be a seasonal gesture at all.

In this installment of my weekly posts of gratitude leading up to Thanksgiving I want to say just how thankful I am for my family.  In my life family means so much more than just those to whom I am related by blood.  I am blessed to have had in my life both a loving mother and a caring step-mother.  Troy has step-family as well, which means that my children are growing up with a wonderful over abundance of aunts, uncles and grandparents galore!  I have more sisters than some people have first cousins and it makes for great (though loud and sometimes rowdy) times when we all gather together.

These past few weeks have been rough with Troy working five or six nights a week.  Without the support of my family I don't know that I would be sane enough today to be writing this post.  I have the utmost respect and admiration for single parents who do this every.single.day.  You are super-heroes!

In additional to traditional familial ties I have also been blessed with a church family in which the members care for and love one another.  There have been a few storms in my life that this special family has helped me weather.  I am so thankful to have them in my life and they hold a special place in my heart.

I know without a doubt that my family isn't always sunshine and rainbows.  We have our share of drama and trials, but in the end we're always there for each other and I'm so eternally grateful for them!

For this weeks Thanksgiving craft I want to share an easy, tasty treat that my girls enjoy making at Thanksgiving.

Marshmallow Pilgrim Hats from Disney FamilyFun

Ingredients

24 chocolate-striped shortbread cookies

12-ounce package of chocolate chips

24 marshmallows

tube of yellow decorators' frosting

Instructions

Set the chocolate-striped cookies stripes down on a wax-paper-covered tray, spacing them well apart.

Melt the chocolate chips in a microwave or double boiler.

One at a time, stick a wooden toothpick into a marshmallow, dip the marshmallow into the melted chocolate, and promptly center it atop a cookie.

Using a second toothpick to lightly hold down the marshmallow, carefully pull out the first toothpick.

Chill the hats until the chocolate sets, then pipe a yellow decorators' frosting buckle on the front of each hat.

"For, after all, put it as we may to ourselves, we are all of us from birth to death guests at a table which we did not spread. The sun, the earth, love, friends, our very breath are parts of the banquet... Shall we think of the day as a chance to come nearer to our Host, and to find out something of Him who has fed us so long?" ~ Rebecca Harding Davis

A Time for Thanks Giving - Part Two

This is the second post in my Thanksgiving series.  Before the big turkey day feast in a few weeks I want to continue to focus on being sincerely grateful for the blessings in my life.

I am so very thankful to have a great group of friends.  What I lack in quantity of close freinds is more than compensated for in their quality.  They are the kind of friends that a girl can laugh with, cry with and tell her darkest secrets to... usually all in the same conversation.  The common tie that binds us all together is our love of God and our desire to be strong women of faith.  They are my encouragers, my prayer partners, and are there to hold me accountable when I stumble.  Without them I don't know where I would be.

A simple and easy idea to get the family involved in the spirit of gratitude is a Blessings Box like this one found on Blissfully Domestic.  A simply box is decorated and placed in an accessible location with slips of paper.  Throughout the year family members write downtheir blessings and tuck them away in the box.  Then on Thanksgiving they can be read aloud.

"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity.... It turns problems into gifts, failures into success, the unexpected into perfect timing, and mistakes into important events. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow." ~ Melody Beattie

A Time for Thanks Giving - Part One

Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays.  It brings together a few of my favorite past times.... cooking, eating and spending time with family.

This year during this holiday season I really want to focus on being truly thankful.  In a world where so many go hungry, thirsty, and without the basic necessities of life, I (and all of you reading this blog) have been provided with an overabundance of blessings.  When is the last time we showed sincere appreciation for them?

Each Wednesday until Thanksgiving I will post about something I am truly thankful for as well as an idea of how to get our children and families actively involved in giving thanks.

Today I give thanks for my husband.  Genesis 2:18 tells me that I was created with the purpose of providing companionship and help to my husband.

The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him." Gen 2:18

God not only provided my husband with a help-mate, but He provided me with a husband who 99.99% of the time willingly shows his appreciation of my help.  He does not intentionally take me for granted as a wife and mother.  I am blessed that he strives and sacrifices to be a good provider, husband, father and friend.

Kristen from We Are That Family posted this Give Thanks Countdown Calendar on (In)Courage.  It looks like a fantastic way to get every member of the family to share what they are thankful for.

In closing I leave you with Hannah's Song of Thanksgiving from 1 Samuel 2:1-10.

1 Then Hannah prayed and said:
"My heart rejoices in the LORD;
in the LORD my horn [a] is lifted high.
My mouth boasts over my enemies,
for I delight in your deliverance.

2 "There is no one holy like the LORD;
there is no one besides you;
there is no Rock like our God.

3 "Do not keep talking so proudly
or let your mouth speak such arrogance,
for the LORD is a God who knows,
and by him deeds are weighed.

4 "The bows of the warriors are broken,
but those who stumbled are armed with strength.

5 Those who were full hire themselves out for food,
but those who were hungry hunger no more.
She who was barren has borne seven children, but she who has had many sons pines away.

 6 "The LORD brings death and makes alive;
he brings down to the grave and raises up.

7 The LORD sends poverty and wealth;
he humbles and he exalts.

 8 He raises the poor from the dust
and lifts the needy from the ash heap;
he seats them with princes
and has them inherit a throne of honor.
"For the foundations of the earth are the LORD's;
upon them he has set the world.

9 He will guard the feet of his saints,
but the wicked will be silenced in darkness.
"It is not by strength that one prevails;

10 those who oppose the LORD will be shattered.
He will thunder against them from heaven;
the LORD will judge the ends of the earth.
"He will give strength to his king
and exalt the horn of his anointed."

Old Testament Truths - Hosea

I am not ashamed to admit that I consider myself a relatively "young" Christian. Oh, I was saved and baptized as a young girl, but my faith never really grew until the past few years. For years I would read my Bible occasionally and think to myself... "what in the world is that supposed to mean?" This was most especially true about the Old Testament. Even if I did make it through the "begats" I could rarely see how the stories applied to my life.


Not too long ago, as if a veil had been lifted from my eyes, I see the value and truths in much of the Old Testament scripture that seemed so antiquated and irrelevant to me before. I can get downright giddy when the stories come to life in my head and I realize that what God spoke to the Israelites so long ago is still His Word today. I have come to realize that I need to write this stuff down, so here is as good a place as any to do it. I know that my ramblings may seem so simple and less-than-profound to those that may read this (if anyone does read it...lol.) but I want to be able to look back and see what God spoke to me on this day.

This morning I read through the book of Hosea after hearing a little about the story of Hosea and Gomer on the radio. It is an amazing look at God's love for the Israelites and for us, no matter how far from Him we wander.

In Hosea, the Israelites have turned from God.

Hosea 4:1-2

1 Hear the word of the LORD, you Israelites,
because the LORD has a charge to bring
against you who live in the land:

"There is no faithfulness, no love,
no acknowledgment of God in the land.

2 There is only cursing, lying and murder,
stealing and adultery;
they break all bounds,
and bloodshed follows bloodshed."

Hosea 13:2

2"Now they sin more and more;
they make idols for themselves from their silver,
cleverly fashioned images,
all of them the work of craftsmen.

It is said of these people,
"They offer human sacrifice
and kiss the calf-idols."

When I think about the world that we live in today I can see so many of these very things present, even in my own life. While we may not be sacrificing one another to false gods and kissing calf idols, how many idols have I made of my stuff, my very own silver?

The Lord was angry with the Israelites! They were His people. He had cared for them and brought them out of slavery.

Hosea 13:4-9

4 But I am the LORD your God,
who brought you out of Egypt.
You shall acknowledge no God but me,
no Savior except me.

5 I cared for you in the desert,
in the land of burning heat.

6 When I fed them, they were satisfied;
when they were satisfied, they became proud;
then they forgot me.

7 So I will come upon them like a lion,
like a leopard I will lurk by the path.

8 Like a bear robbed of her cubs,
I will attack them and rip them open.
Like a lion I will devour them;
a wild animal will tear them apart.

9 "You are destroyed, O Israel,
because you are against me, against your helper.

How often do we forget what God has done for us? Do we take the blessing he provides and become proud?

Despite His anger, God loved the Israelites deeply and wanted so much for them to repent and turn to Him. God never quits desiring for us to come back to Him, no matter what we do, no matter how far we go. We can never get too far from God that He isn't asking us to come back!

Hosea 14:1-2

1 Return, O Israel, to the LORD your God.
Your sins have been your downfall!

2 Take words with you
and return to the LORD.
Say to him:
"Forgive all our sins
and receive us graciously,
that we may offer the fruit of our lips.

Despite His anger and the punishment that Israel deserves God proves that He is a compassionate and merciful God. He can't bring Himself to destroy the Israelites with His wrath and fury.

Hosea 11:8-11

8 "How can I give you up, Ephraim?
How can I hand you over, Israel?
How can I treat you like Admah?
How can I make you like Zeboiim?
My heart is changed within me;
all my compassion is aroused.

9 I will not carry out my fierce anger,
nor will I turn and devastate Ephraim.
For I am God, and not man—
the Holy One among you.
I will not come in wrath.

10 They will follow the LORD;
he will roar like a lion.
When he roars,
his children will come trembling from the west.

11 They will come trembling
like birds from Egypt,
like doves from Assyria.
I will settle them in their homes,"
declares the LORD.

Despite everything the Israelites did, all of their sin, the Lord still had plans for them. He has the same plans for us. One day we will be betrothed to Him in righteousness and justice, in love and compassion, and in faithfulness!  God still holds this promise for us just as He did for the Israelites of Old Testament days.

Hosea 2:14-20

14 "Therefore I am now going to allure her;
I will lead her into the desert
and speak tenderly to her.

15 There I will give her back her vineyards,
and will make the Valley of Achor a door of hope.
There she will sing as in the days of her youth,
as in the day she came up out of Egypt.

16 "In that day," declares the LORD,
"you will call me 'my husband';
you will no longer call me 'my master.'

17 I will remove the names of the Baals from her lips;
no longer will their names be invoked.

18 In that day I will make a covenant for them
with the beasts of the field and the birds of the air
and the creatures that move along the ground.

Bow and sword and battle
I will abolish from the land,
so that all may lie down in safety.

19 I will betroth you to me forever;
I will betroth you in righteousness and justice,
in love and compassion.

20 I will betroth you in faithfulness,
and you will acknowledge the LORD.